The unexpressed essence of your memory,
should she ever endeavor to touch,
don’t narrate those stories,
for she may imagine them.
Beliefs of minuscule significance,
contained till now with fortitude,
don’t weaken those bricks,
for she may dispossess them.
Respite found during the downpours,
with the release of pinching thoughts,
don’t reiterate the moments once lived,
for she may never relish them.
Celebrated occasions with exuberance,
counted partly with enthusiasm,
don’t cloud delights with incertitude,
for she may plead to forget them.
Flames of desires and hopes,
carried from an impatient dawn,
don’t admonish with skepticism,
for she may want to survive them.
Returning from an exhausting journey,
desiring comfort from the most trusted soul,
don’t engrave anguish too soon,
for she may not alight tonight.
Very appropriately and convincingly you portray a sad and a beautiful picture, of desires and longings, and pain deliberately inflicted. I am sure your readers can feel for "She" and the immense feelings and emotions in her little heart. I specially loved the way it has been doled out, measured words, and there is a certain innate flow to them that makes reading the entire piece an experience of sorts. It is almost as if one is travelling with this little girl (I prefer to see "she" as a little girl) and there are things of infinite significance and importance that happen to her as the reader sits almost helplessly by her side, hoping only to hold her hands and speak a few words, for the pain and melancholy which is unexpressed is almost terrifying. One can, I guess, only feel for her as she sits in a corner, huddled up like a little bundle, with her tiny little heart beating and weeping. Will she alight tonight?
ReplyDeleteAn excellent first post. Would look forward for more. Good going!
very well written.
ReplyDeleteits heart touching and beautifully expresses the silent emotions that one may go around with in life!
Rhythmic troughs and crests, a tidal of emotions wash through the poem, wetting the reader with emotions, subtle and strong.
ReplyDeleteA lot unexpressed, yet said in blunt words!
A beautiful, beautiful first post, and my favourtie "for she may not alight tonight."
Great work! Waiting for more!
I see this as a journey,you know. Journey of a lady from the fore front of emotions. You have managed to connect one sentiment to another as if they were pearls to complete a neck piece. They just fit in to give a beautiful image. A great read,very strongly essayed. Each fragment gripped me,the flow of words put me there in the same frame as the lady being portrayed.I was in awe line after line.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely loved the rhythm!
Heartiest congratulations! The Lavender Salvation. Quite a stirring name in it's entirety and very you.
Waiting in the earnest to read more.
I see this as a journey,you know. Journey of a lady from the fore front of emotions. You have managed to connect one sentiment to another as if they were pearls to complete a neck piece. They just fit in to give a beautiful image. A great read,very strongly essayed. Each fragment gripped me,the flow of words put me there in the same frame as the lady being portrayed.I was in awe line after line.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely loved the rhythm!
Heartiest congratulations! The Lavender Salvation. Quite a stirring name in it's entirety and very you.
Waiting in the earnest to read more.